FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN
Updated: May 15
Recently I’ve been speaking to a lot of creators who are; a) thinking about setting up an OnlyFans, b) have started an OnlyFans and are cautious to put anything up, or c) have started putting things up on their OnlyFans and don’t want to start promoting it.
I thought I’d write today about my experiences with this, because I very recently was in EXACTLY the same boat! When we don’t understand something it often means we put up a tonne of barriers and excuses to protect ourselves.
I for instance always put off things that I think I’m not going to be very good at, usually because of self doubt - we naturally don’t want to fail at things and it’s way easier to put something off than to dive in head first and (very likely) be a bit shit at it!
Personally, I’m a bit of a perfectionist and I find it very frustrating when I don’t absolutely NAIL something. When you combine the above with those nagging doubts like ‘why would anyone follow me’, ‘I’m not good enough’, and ‘there are so many people already doing it’ it can often completely stop us in our tracks.
I was SO fearful that people wouldn’t subscribe to mine, honestly, because I don’t get much out! I’ve never shot anything above topless in my career (bar one shoot for Playboy) and I was quite frankly, a little bit nervous about the nature of the platform, from what I’d seen around the web.
Now don’t get me wrong, I fully support every creator on OnlyFans and think it’s absolutely incredible what it has done for the sex industry, in my opinion it is hands down the best site out there in terms of monetisation for this type of work, however, the more ‘hardcore’ side of it isn’t something I personally would do - so I was naturally cautious.
One big lesson I had to learn in lockdown?
That I had to start throwing caution to the wind and to learn to lean into as many things as possible, to give stuff a go and just think “f*** it” a bit more! This however was predominantly fuelled by the fact that I’d seemingly overnight, lost my rather lucrative job as an international fire performer - SO I decided to stop panicking, and to give it a go!
My best advice for people thinking about starting an OnlyFans
Without a shadow of a doubt; read the Get Your Bits Out workbook front to back. I didn’t start using the platform for SO long, because I didn’t understand how it worked and the sheer thought of learning something new was a lot! I built it up massively in my head. Genuinely, even as a veteran model, the workbook and advice from Alex was invaluable. I followed everything and sought advice from her and others within her network (the GYBO ambassadors mostly) to answer all of my questions.
KNOW YOUR LEVELS - It helps to have a very clear idea of what you want to achieve and stick to it; Alex talks a lot about levels in the initial stages of the workbook, this is REALLY important. I knew from the start exactly what I wanted to achieve, and what I was comfortable with. This for me was one of my initial reservations and excuses as to why it wasn’t going to work for me - and it was absolutely not the case! What I do works for me and my fans like what I do as it’s what I have always done. Never feel pressured to bend your levels because a fan asks you to. Stick to it, and own what you do whether that’s fitness, writing, tease, pinup, or full blown sex - if you stick within your parameters it will keep you safe mentally.
START SHOOTING; This for me was the hardest thing!! Even though I have shot a million times, self shooting just made me SO overly critical and honestly, I think it’s because we have to look at HUNDREDS of pictures of our own face and body over and over and over. By the time we release the set we’ve seen it about 9 million times and are quite frankly over it. The hard part is starting and putting yourself out there.
JUST DO IT - once you start somewhere you can build on it, you will get better at it over time, no one is great at it the first time, I certainly wasn’t!
PLAN - Both Alex and I talk about planning a LOT. I felt absolutely out of control when I first started with Onlyfans if I’m honest. Why? Because to do it well, like really nail it - you need to post daily at least 5-6 times, with a dialogue that resonates with whatever it is you are trying to sell. That is not easy when you’re working alone, alongside managing your audience and shooting! IT IS A FULL TIME JOB, if you want to do really well. What does that mean? PLAN PLAN PLAN. I shoot once a week 3-5 sets, I schedule everything usually on another day so I can then manage and plan throughout the week. It only works for me if I do it that way, and the key to this platform - just like ALL the social platforms is extreme consistency.
MAKE MISTAKES - Do not worry if your content isn’t perfect, if you accidentally send out messages that were meant to be paid without any money attached, or if you spell some things wrong on your feed. Like anything we haven’t done before, you have to start somewhere. Being genuinely you, putting yourself out there and connecting with your audience authentically is way more important to your fans.
FAKE CONFIDENCE - We’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Look at yourself in the mirror when you’re shooting and tell yourself you’re an absolute BADASS. Sometimes we have to convince ourselves that we have confidence that simply doesn’t exist! Confidence isn’t a natural thing I believe to anyone - you have to tell yourself you’re awesome, because trust me, no one else will unless WE BELIEVE it, *or at least fake believe it*.
LEARN - I learnt by following the best of the best, and observing how they did it. Do your research, talk to other creators and follow people who are killing it. Alex literally taught me everything and is one of the best creators out there on OnlyFans. Book in for consultations with our ambassadors, talk to me about social media - reach out to people who have done well in the field that you’re interested in and learn inside out how they became successful and find how you can apply it to you.
KEEP AT IT - Do not give up if you’re not in the top 1% of OnlyFans in a month, it categorically doesn’t work like that. You have to work really hard to build yourself up slowly, to develop a fanbase that are loyal and trust that you’re consistent. Think about longevity over fast results.
BUILD A NETWORK - Work on building a network of creators around you that you can talk to and lean on when you want to know something! The Get Your Bits Out ✨Bits List✨ on our FREE OnlyFans is a great place for this, alongside our usual social media platforms.
Not only have I superseded my expectations massively in a month (I’m now top 9% which I am OVER THE MOON WITH) I realised that the stigma I had attached to the word ‘OnlyFans’ was purely in my head. When we stop giving a shit about what people think, and do what we want to do, within our own parameters (set out stringently at the start) it’s incredibly liberating being able to make money within the pandemic, and I am eternally grateful for it.
We often limit ourselves because of fear, we tell ourselves we can’t, but we absolutely can, and we often surprise ourselves with the results!