Sex Worker Allies
by Frankii Wilde
One of the hardest parts of being a sexy content creator is not being able to talk about it in a way that everyday people understand. For example, my oldest friend since childhood - who works a ‘Vanilla’ job - is not going to be able to relate to a ‘broke Barry’ squabbling over the price of my PPVS or the constant barrage of inbox messages I get trying to ‘level push’ by not paying enough attention to what content I actually provide. Sometimes you just need people that ‘get it’ when you need to blow off some steam rather than venting on your socials (remember these are what your customers and potential subscribers see) - people that can support each other in ways that people with ‘Vanilla’ or regular jobs just can’t.
When I first started as a professional model, burlesque performer and (secret stripper) I always had a ‘sisterhood’ of industry friends where we built and lifted each other up and recommended each other for work. I would not have gotten as far as I did if it wasn’t for my friends in that world that I could laugh and cry with. My mental wellbeing would not have been able to process and cope without the support of people who understood.
When I returned to this crazy life after a brief retirement I realised that all my friends who modelled and performed with me the first time round had retired and moved onto more mainstream careers. It dawned on me that I was alone now... and that was scary.
That being said I did actually end up making a few new sexy content creator friends and before I became an ambassador for GYBO I joined their Free OnlyFans and enjoyed the camaraderie of talking with similar like minded individuals.
I guess there is no guidebook on how to make sex worker friendships and alliances, but this is what I did:
● Followed other sexy content creators on social media
● Engaged with people I thought had similar interests/sense of humor
● Reached out to people when prompted (don’t just slide into someone's DMs asking a
boat load of questions when you've never connected with them before - it’s rude and can
be as bad as an unsolicited dick pic)
● Looked at what resources/communities are out there such as GYBO
● I was myself, I like to help people so if I could offer someone help or advice I didn’t think
twice about doing it.
● Be patient. It takes time to build a rapport with someone and friendships can take even
longer to develop.
Slowly but surely I’m happy to say I have developed a few friendships with people I feel like I have known my whole life. I now have a few new sexy content creator friends I can talk to about the nitty gritty of this job but also share the funny aspects of it too. Lift and build each other up and feel confident that I feel I’m no longer alone to deal with the trials and tribulations with this job.
This job is hard, we already feel alienated due the constant discrimination we face. Sex Work is
not seen as a real job by many and to have allies in this industry that can have your back and
support you is so so important for your wellbeing and mental health.
Don’t feel like you are alone, we are all in this together and I’ve found the SWer community to be the kindest and most welcoming of any of the careers I’ve had.
Just be yourself and be kind. Treat others how you wanted to be treated and we’ll all get along just fine.